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Pineapple justice

|Written By Heather Gardiner

Is pineapple crunchy?

This was the hottest question being debated by my colleagues this afternoon after I shared the news an Osgoode Hall Law School student anonymously sent an e-mail to fellow administrative law classmates regarding their “peculiar eating disorders.”

A bit of a food fight has broken out at Osgoode.

In the e-mail, the student complains about students’ lack of etiquette and courtesy when it comes to eating in class. The student even provides some “basic guiding principles” for better eating habits, which include waiting to eat until the 10-minute break in class and making appropriate food choices (i.e. NOT eating tuna or deli sandwiches, chips, apples, pineapples and “other crunchy fruit.”)

And if you can’t stick to these guidelines, the student suggests you sit at the back of the classroom where you are less likely to disrupt others while you mow down.

This story has gone viral and the comments are flowing in. Many have commented on the article posted on American web site Jezebel.

Some are mocking:

“Thank your lucky stars he didn’t mention the loudest fruit of all: The Banana!” wrote MainMan82.

“You should hear me eat a kiwi. Just saying,” La.C. added.

“If only there were a place w[h]ere people could go to learn how to resolve disputes in a thoughtful, deliberate, yet-still-adversarial manner — and not through huffy, longwinded letters that misunderstand fruit,” said Sparkle_Motion.

Some got defensive:

“I work full time and I’m currently in school full time in the evenings. I always snack in class. I get a bag of chips (yeah, I’m super ‘unhealthy’) from the vending machine that only offers crunchy foods and I sit in the back of my classes and slowly eat them. I eat them as discretely as possible but I do eat them. Because if I don’t eat something it’s far more unpleasant for me and everyone around me than if I do eat something,” wrote PuckFinn.

Others were supportive:

“Too bad this letter isn’t being received well because people be crayzay with they eating. Oh my god. Microwaving fish in the office kitchen should be punishable by death. And if you can’t chew with your mouth closed, you should go home and practice until you can. My god,” wrote Ohgreatthisagain.

Dirtqueen wrote: “Look, concentrating in class is hard. Having a bunch of people crunching, slurping, gnawing throughout a class is unhelpful to all students. It’s highly disrespectful to the professor, and the people around.”

Some professors even weighed in:

“While I agree that this person is obnoxious and uptight as a professor I can say there are few things (texting in class, taking/making phone calls in class, falling asleep) that are ruder than eating in class. Yes, I realize people have busy schedules, and I’m not unsympathetic, but just because someone’s schedule is hectic doesn’t mean that eating in class isn’t loud, distracting, and rude. These things are not mutually exclusive,” wrote wonderfulfroward.

Cinzia said: “From the point of view of an instructor, I sympathize. Nothing more depressing than facing a group of students who resemble ruminating cows, their jaws working methodically, relentlessly, in unison. I’ve even had students bring in bags of popcorn (they get it free at the Student Center) — as though my class is an afternoon matinee. I even had a student have a pizza delivered once. It can be rather distracting.”

It will be awhile before this filters out of the Osgoode community. Supposedly, the administration is conducting an investigation into this. In addition, several Osgoode students are hosting an event at the law school today called “Osgoode Emergency Pineapple Appreciation Day.” And for those wanting to share their thoughts publicly, the law school’s student paper Obiter Dicta is accepting reactions from students until Sunday.

So what’s the verdict — is pineapple crunchy? Please leave your comments below. Or Tweet with the hashtag #crunchypineapple.


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